Wednesday 31 August 2011

Conversation with a potential employee.

We're recruiting staff.September sees the departure of the summer workers off to university.
One of our girls has actually found a 'proper' job having worked for us since she was 15 right through university.Chef says its the end of an era.
I suppose therein lies the problem,most British workers still view hospitality work as a stopping off point en route to a permanent job,its a shame that its still not viewed by many as a career option.Though admittedly the long and unsocial hours aren't a great selling point.
I've trawled through a weird and wonderful array of CV's.
It struck me that perhaps some of the applicants could do with a few pointers on how to successfully apply for a job.
Obviously this is just my personal opinion of course.other potential employers may have different criteria.

1.Keep it brief
One or two pages max.Any CV longer than this goes straight in the bin.Its not that I'm not interested in you,you understand,its just that I DON'T HAVE TIME TO READ IT.

2.Check your spelling and grammar.

3.Keep the information relevant to the application,giving some indication that you have actually researched what the job is and what qualities are required.
For example I'm not really interested that you are 'qualified to use the St Tropez ultimate air system and have a level 2 certificate in Jessica manicures' or that you have '6 months small animal care experience',whilst the kitchen staff(and sometimes the customers for that matter)may sometimes act like animals,we are not recruiting a zoo keeper.

4.Include contact details(surprising how many don't),keep it sensible for example:if your email address is on the lines of 'pink iced buns@ mail.co.uk' its probably time to make a change,unless you're applying to a lap dancing club of course.

5.It may be a good idea not to be overly liberal with the truth if you want to give yourself a chance of even making the interview stage.For example 'I have had many jobs but as yet have never managed to hold down a full time job' or 'I have no relevant experience but am willing to give it a go and see if it works out' or even 'mostly I like to just sit at home,watch TV and relax,much like anyone else'....... does not exactly instil me with confidence in your enthusiasm or energy levels..

Today I rang one of the applicants I'd selected for interview.

Self:Hello I'm *me* from the Inn,I'm ringing with regard to your application for work.

Applicant:Ah yes.... the BAR JOB..

Self:Would you be able to pop over for a chat one afternoon next week?

Applicant:Should be OK,when were you thinking?

Self:Would Wednesday afternoon about 2.30 be OK?

Applicant:Make it a bit earlier?

Self:No I'm sorry I'm over at the pub every lunchtime so I'm only back at the inn between 2.30 and 5pm.

Applicant:How about Monday?

Self:No I cant do Monday

Applicant:Friday?

Self:No I'm sorry I'm very busy on Fridays I can only do Tuesday,Wednesday or Thursday.

Applicant:It shouldn't take long, I'm a medical student,taking a year out.

Self: Oh????I'm very sorry but I just cant spare any time on Friday

Applicant: Oh that doesn't work,that just doesn't work  for me AT ALL..

Self:Gulp

Applicant:Tell you what lets just leave it till the following week,Thursday afternoon,3pm, OK with you??

Self:...........................................................

And I thought there were over 2 million people unemployed in this country.




8 comments:

Nicky said...

They should be taught CV writing at school. Rule No. 1, write for your audience, not for yourself (i.e. if you were the owner of the Inn what would you be looking for, and how quickly can I show him/her that I have that to offer?)

Alison Cross said...

You would think, wouldn't you, that with all that unemployment looming, you would have hundreds of great applicants.

I bet you end up with a very keen, very personable Eastern European girl. I don't think that there's a pub or hotel in Scotland that would survive without their great work ethic. Or maybe an Australian. There are loads of them here too.

Fingers crossed for you ;-)

Ali x

TheBoyandMe said...

Someone has delusions of grandeur don't they? Does he/she know that they are the employee and *you* the employer?

Unknown said...

Medical students are wankers. Truly from the school of 'I don't need you, you need me'... Have you thought of employing a slightly older person from your generation who understands what the word hospitality actually means? We're going to have a huge issue with this generation of school losers, sorry school leavers, who just don't have a clue... Unless you do the job interviews 'X-Factor' stylie... maybe they'll get that?... Ridiculous!

Northern Snippet said...

Nicky-think they do teach it,obv not very well:(

Ali-The thing that surprises me is how many are looking for pt time work,then when I ask what they aredoing the rest of the time they look surprised and reply 'nothing'.30hours seems to be the max.Obv there are exceptions...

TBAM-I'm already preparing for my interview,brushing up on my technique etc...

DOM-I would love to employ an older person,sadly they don't seem to apply.I should add we have always managed to find good staff who like to stay,just seems to be getting harder to find them:(

Young at Heart said...

un-f****** believable.......good luck with the search....your previous blog has left me now desperate for roast beef!!!

Twisted Scottish Bastard said...

Some of the poor bastards here in our school teach "writing CVs" to our kids in voc. ed.
They're quite entertaining, with apt phrases like:
"I can now cut my toenails and tie my shoelaces without supervision"
and
"I look forward to experimenting with your services"
and
"I've never really worked so I don't know if I'll enjoy it"

Stay away from the Medical Students. They'll treat you and the customers like "less than dogshit on the sole of their shoe"

Good luck in finding a good worker;they're a vanishing breed.

Deborah said...

Geez, the entitlement generation at large---

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