What I didn't eat yesterday.

I love Autumn.Crisp fresh mornings,the colours,the settling back into some semblance of a routine after the summer madness and a thankfully cooler working environment.
Most of all I love the food.Hearty stews,game dishes,foraged food,nursery puddings.
Comfort food at its best.Bliss.
Just as I was easing into the more comfortable and predictable work pace,Chef dropped an unexpected bombshell.

He wants us to adopt a healthy lifestyle "so that we're rejuvenated and ready to cope with the Christmas rush."

Now you may think that working in a food environment we would eat well.Not so,its probably the most unhealthy of professions.Most of the time there just isn't time to eat.Weekdays aren't too bad as I described here,but weekends are comprised of a repeating cycle of coffee,Red Bull,chocolate,beer,wine,late night snacks(crisps,nuts and porky scratchings..)Along with the constant grazing on chips and tasting of sauces etc.

This week though in line with the new regime, our main meal of the day has consisted of a protein item(steak,lamb chops,duck leg or the like)accompanied by a simple salad and boiled potatoes.

So,in direct contravention to my previous post(What I ate yesterday)may I proudly present:

What I didn't eat Yesterday.




No North Sea Coley..



... lamb chops with peas and smoked bacon..



no confit duck leg with Daupinoise ptotates..



...steak and chips...



pigeon..



Rib of beef a definite no no...



as was bread and butter pudding..



and Bakewell tart..



well maybe just a bit in the interests of quality control..

I can cope with the reformed eating program,and the weekday alcohol embargo,but the final suggestion has me feeling like this.



He wants us TO JOIN THE LOCAL GYM.
I wouldn't say I was unfit,inactive or unsportsmanlike,being a former county hockey and 100 metres runner,(though admittedly this was in ones school days),since then I confess I haven't partaken of any structured sporting activity,however, being on one's feet for 14 hours plus every day kind of compensates.I lift a fair amount of weight around(apart from my own),I lug casks daily and have devised an ingenious way of flipping them onto the racking system which avoids unnecessary lifting and cleverly enables me to do this single handedly.Various dray-men have been suitably impressed by this skill.

I'm harbouring a big fat secret-I have never been to a gym before.I'm frightened.All those complicated machines and the Lycra clad bodies who know exactly how to work them.I don't know the protocol and it fills me with fear and dread.

As I was pondering possible excuses for not fulfilling this part of the new ethos my mobile rang:

Self:Hello
Unknown caller:Who's that?
Self:Who's that?
Unknown Caller: Oh I think I must have the wrong number
Self:Yes you must
Unknown Caller:Oh OK sorry Bye
Self:OK Goodbye

A couple of minutes later I received the following text:

'I know you might think this is forward,but may I take you out to dinner?You sound naughty.'

With the knowledge that my 16 year old son BG often borrows my phone to text friends, a situation enforced due to his poor money managements skills and the resultant absence of credit on his phone.Being aware also of his hectic social calendar and extended circle of friends raging in age 16-20yrs,I have a fair idea that the mystery caller will have been one of his mates.Sending texts from ones mothers phone without alerting ones friends to this fact will invariably result in a reply call or text to the same phone at some point.

This occurrence was the cause of much hilarity in the kitchen and amongst the waiting staff.Chef laughed a little too heartily at the folly of it for my liking.

I believe the sudden enthusiasm for the new clean living regime has less to do with any fear of us beginning to resemble our role model:



(now there's a guy who appreciates a good feed)
and more to do with Chefs fast approaching birthday,transition into the fourth decade and accompanying intimations of mortality.

Methinks I shall be giving the gym a wide berth,besides,I have my potential toyboy secret admirer to fall back on now...

No,instead I've helpfully stuck a timely reminder on the fridge door:

'Fridge Pickers have bigger knickers'

Much more my style..

Comments

I feel hungry now, what gorgeous food, I would have the duck followed by the bakewell please!
Alison Cross said…
Where the hell is your pub?! I am coming for a meal at SOME POINT *wipes drool off keyboard*

Re mystery message - I suspect that it might actually be for you!

gym = waste of money

Take it from someone who keeps joining, starting off well, then not going - thereby making it a waste of money and engendering much in the way of good catholic guilt!

Ali x
Young at Heart said…
yeah..now am hungry again.....forget the gym just don't eat big meals in the evening.....well not every evening and only eat half of everything naughty you want........I'll have half of one of those mini bakewell tarts please!! Your blog is going to need some kind warning......may contain scenes of a delicious nature that could seriously damage your figure!!!
Second Ali's comments. Where is the pub. I have a few friends back home who would love to frequent your establishment.
All good advice,don't really want to put the pub name on the blog due to the fact that I've been spilling the beans on the customers,but it you leave an e mail address will let you know!
Alison Cross said…
alison.cross2@virgin.net - let me know, I want to come visit!

Ali x
I had no idea Paul Prudhomme looked like that, that's hilarious!! He looks like something off the Paxo packets in the 80s.

Don't be scared of the gym, people are so self absorbed in their iPods noone takes a blind bit of notice of anyone else plus 75% people will be in the same boat as you as gyms have such a high drop out rate - she says, about to re-register with one for the ninth time probably.
Sarah-to be fair The Paul Prudhomme book is an old book,trawling through bookshops for old cookery books is a bit of a hobby,I'm sure he must have lost weight otherwise he couldn't possibly have survived-could he?
Re the gym Im still not convinced but maybe one day!
Oooh that rib of beef looks delicious! I'm trying to be good at the moment but it only lasts about a day, if that! xx
Christina-thanks for stopping by,Im also trying to be good but failing miserably!
BTW Ali-sent you the e mail!

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