Most of all I love the food.Hearty stews,game dishes,foraged food,nursery puddings.
Comfort food at its best.Bliss.
Just as I was easing into the more comfortable and predictable work pace,Chef dropped an unexpected bombshell.
He wants us to adopt a healthy lifestyle "so that we're rejuvenated and ready to cope with the Christmas rush."
Now you may think that working in a food environment we would eat well.Not so,its probably the most unhealthy of professions.Most of the time there just isn't time to eat.Weekdays aren't too bad as I described here,but weekends are comprised of a repeating cycle of coffee,Red Bull,chocolate,beer,wine,late night snacks(crisps,nuts and porky scratchings..)Along with the constant grazing on chips and tasting of sauces etc.
This week though in line with the new regime, our main meal of the day has consisted of a protein item(steak,lamb chops,duck leg or the like)accompanied by a simple salad and boiled potatoes.
So,in direct contravention to my previous post(What I ate yesterday)may I proudly present:
What I didn't eat Yesterday.
No North Sea Coley..
... lamb chops with peas and smoked bacon..
no confit duck leg with Daupinoise ptotates..
...steak and chips...
Rib of beef a definite no no...
as was bread and butter pudding..
and Bakewell tart..
well maybe just a bit in the interests of quality control..
I can cope with the reformed eating program,and the weekday alcohol embargo,but the final suggestion has me feeling like this.
He wants us TO JOIN THE LOCAL GYM.
I wouldn't say I was unfit,inactive or unsportsmanlike,being a former county hockey and 100 metres runner,(though admittedly this was in ones school days),since then I confess I haven't partaken of any structured sporting activity,however, being on one's feet for 14 hours plus every day kind of compensates.I lift a fair amount of weight around(apart from my own),I lug casks daily and have devised an ingenious way of flipping them onto the racking system which avoids unnecessary lifting and cleverly enables me to do this single handedly.Various dray-men have been suitably impressed by this skill.
I'm harbouring a big fat secret-I have never been to a gym before.I'm frightened.All those complicated machines and the Lycra clad bodies who know exactly how to work them.I don't know the protocol and it fills me with fear and dread.
As I was pondering possible excuses for not fulfilling this part of the new ethos my mobile rang:
Unknown caller:Who's that?
Unknown Caller: Oh I think I must have the wrong number
Self:Yes you must
Unknown Caller:Oh OK sorry Bye
A couple of minutes later I received the following text:
'I know you might think this is forward,but may I take you out to dinner?You sound naughty.'
With the knowledge that my 16 year old son BG often borrows my phone to text friends, a situation enforced due to his poor money managements skills and the resultant absence of credit on his phone.Being aware also of his hectic social calendar and extended circle of friends raging in age 16-20yrs,I have a fair idea that the mystery caller will have been one of his mates.Sending texts from ones mothers phone without alerting ones friends to this fact will invariably result in a reply call or text to the same phone at some point.
This occurrence was the cause of much hilarity in the kitchen and amongst the waiting staff.Chef laughed a little too heartily at the folly of it for my liking.
I believe the sudden enthusiasm for the new clean living regime has less to do with any fear of us beginning to resemble our role model:
(now there's a guy who appreciates a good feed)
and more to do with Chefs fast approaching birthday,transition into the fourth decade and accompanying intimations of mortality.
Methinks I shall be giving the gym a wide berth,besides,I have my
No,instead I've helpfully stuck a timely reminder on the fridge door:
'Fridge Pickers have bigger knickers'
Much more my style..